Talking myself off a ledge

I’m in my ninth year trying to finish a dissertation. This is unlike the other blog I started and abandoned. That one was meandering, this one has purpose. My purpose is to give myself a little pep talk because my ADHD shows up periodically as avoidance, shame, and despair. I also feel like disclosing so that other people with ADHD can feel empowered to be themselves and maybe finish their dissertations, too!

This is not about suicide or a physical ledge. It’s about getting unstuck when stuck in writing. The ledge is a metaphorical ledge of writing despair.

I wrote 707 words today, none of them inspired, most of them fought for. Very few of those words will end up being anything except the stirring of ideas.

They say to leave a breadcrumb trail in our writing. How will I continue what I’m working on tomorrow? What if I don’t know what I’m going to write about? What if I can’t figure out where I’m going?

Yesterday, I took a paragraph that I’d written before and realized it was too dense, so I wrote a new paragraph based off of one sentence. I thought this was a great idea to keep moving forward. I tried to leave some breadcrumbs from there, but I couldn’t figure out where I should go. Do I explain the significance of what I just said? What makes the most sense as far as building a narrative that will be comprehensible to someone reading this. Ultimately, I want the thing to be readable. I realized I was starting to spin out and that what I’m doing might be more like revising and not writing what I need to write: a continuous piece of writing that goes from start to finish.

Waves and waves of self doubt creeping up on me while I question my ability to ever get this done. This is what happens when I get to a point in the writing where I’m stuck. I can still feel those waves crash about, and I can conjure them even as I write this.

I realized it’s been so long since I’ve been in coursework that I don’t have a really good idea about what I’m actually producing. What should a dissertation look like? What does a chapter have in it?

I asked Claude what it thought about getting unstuck, and it gave me a few ideas. While I was panicking, I took on the idea of taking what I’d written and just quickly describing each paragraph. I felt huge resistance to doing that, but

What’s working right now:

  • Daily writing sessions (7/7).

  • Texting my adviser when I begin my writing session.

  • Making sure I do not leave work before I complete my writing session.

What’s not working:

  • I skipped a morning workout and scrolled.

  • I canceled a mid-day workout because I don’t feel like being sweaty.

What I realized:

  • I don’t really know what a dissertation is supposed to look like.

  • I don’t really know or remember what a chapter is supposed to look like.

  • I don’t really know what it means to write “one continuous piece of writing from start to finish.”

What I tried today:

  • Briefly looked at dissertations on suburban history; realizing in my off writing time, I should take a look at the genre to get a feel for it.

  • Briefly summarizing paragraphs that I’d written; it helped me realize some framing for an argument that was helpful, and it also showed me how disconnected the paragraphs felt from one another and why they weren’t flowing. Even though I felt resistant to doing it because I hate looking at my writing so much, I did it anyway and don’t regret it.

Where I need to go:

  • I need to get clear on where I’m going in my writing, so that I have a place to begin from and a place to end on. This is going to take a minute just to organize chunks of writing and documents spread out here and there. I feel like this would make the biggest difference.

  • Get on my little desk treadmill. If it’s not going to be sweaty mat pilates, it needs to be something.

Do. Or do not. There is no try.

I’m in my ninth year trying to finish a dissertation. This is unlike the other blog I started and abandoned. That one was meandering, this one has purpose. My purpose is to give myself a little pep talk because my ADHD shows up periodically as avoidance, shame, and despair. I also feel like disclosing so that other people with ADHD can feel empowered to be themselves and maybe finish their dissertations, too!

I recently had occasion to review my CliftonStrengths, and since I paid for all 34, I looked at the bottom 34th, and it reads:

DISCIPLINE

For those of you who aren’t familiar with CliftonStrengths, it doesn’t mean discipline is my greatest weakness. It means that discipline requires the most energy from me of all the other 33 strengths. For contrast, my top ten strengths are those that give me energy at the end of the day rather than taking it away.

So what about other strengths that might contribute to a completed dissertation? Like achiever, (#33) consistency, (#30) deliberative, (#32) responsibility, (#28) or focus? (#24) It looks like it’s gonna take a significant energy lift to get this thing done.

That’s when I got the idea for this blog. This is unlike the other blog I started and abandoned. That one was meandering, this one has purpose. My purpose is to give myself a little pep talk because my ADHD shows up periodically as avoidance, shame, and despair. I also feel like disclosing so that other people with ADHD can feel empowered to be themselves and maybe finish their dissertations, too!

Since we have AI now, I thought I’d outsource my thinking and get a sense of what Claude thought; What are the top ten CliftonStrengths for completing a history dissertation? Then I asked it what the chances are of someone completing a dissertation based on my CliftonStrengths profile.

74%

Not bad! And I have 3 of the top ten in my top ten. Check it out!

  1. Learner (#20)

  2. Analytical (#9)

  3. Input (#10)

  4. Intellection (#18)

  5. Discipline (#34)

  6. Focus (#24)

  7. Achiever (#33)

  8. Responsibility (#28)

  9. Context (#15)

  10. Communication (#7)

Unfortunately, “Discipline and Achiever — the two strengths most responsible for actually finishing — are ranked last and second-to-last.”

However, it still gave me a 74% chance of completing based on the profile alone. Then I added that I have a full-time job, a family, and that I started nine years ago. New calculation?

42%

I have struggled my whole life at things that seemed like they came easy to others, so staring at numbers like these, while vaguely depressing, are nothing new for me. Over time and continuous struggle, I have had to cultivate a self-renewing font of hope and optimism; without it, I would have long ago given up.

When I applied to Stanford, a colleague of mine wrote this, and it is as true then as it is now:

“While he may not be the most highly qualified candidate out of all of the applicants on file, he has the drive and motivation emblematic of Angela Lee Duckworth’s argument about the power of grit. His willingness to take academic and personal risks and his innate curiosity and creativity will make him a welcome addition to any program for which he is qualified.”

This evening, I managed to type out 250 words or so of a paragraph I liked after a long day of work. Day six of six planned writing days. It’s cause for celebration.

I also know that after this many years, my belief that I will be able to continue writing steadily on day seven, then day 8, and day 100, are going to be stiffly challenged. I won’t know what happened. I’ll stop texting my adviser, I’ll stop planning at the beginning of the week, I’ll stop exercising, I’ll start to feel more and more depressed, and I’ll start ducking emails. At least, that’s the pattern. If I could grant any wish, it would be to look back on this paragraph in triumph of beating these odds.

Belief is among my top ten CliftonStrengths, and according to Claude, it can be leveraged as a substitute for the drive to achieve. I have found a topic with purpose, so there is no reason to quit. I may fail, but I will never quit. And in the words of my colleague and friend, I will never “accept the status quo.”

Stay tuned…